i saw a baby with a shirt on that said “Santa doesn’t exist but its okay because i can’t read yet”
i remember once i was walking to class near this group of guys and one of them saw his girlfriend and one of his friends was like “c’mon man bros before hoes” and the guy looked him dead in the eye and said “she’s the bro and y’all bitches are the hoes” before going to talk to his girlfriend and i have never seen a group of guys in sagging jeans and ridiculous shoes look so offended
How you think u parents gon react when u say u want dick and pussy
"this greedy bitch"
I think the funniest thing that’s ever happened to me during a sexual situation was when I was giving my first boyfriend a blow job and he was like “yeah take it all choke on it” and i was already at the base of his dick and it wasn’t anywhere near the back of my throat and I like snorted from laughing, I guess he took at as me “choking” and he came and was like “fuuuck that’s so sexy” and I just came up like
I love working at amazon during the holidays because you get to see all of the things people order for Christmas. It’s fun thinking that the little froggy rainboots you just shipped out will make some toddler miles away squeal with delight, or the earrings you just stuck in a box will earn a kiss.
but then you box a huge black dildo shaped like a fist.
WUSSUP bro uhh yaaaaa I gots a question for YUUU. H0w do i gat a GURL 2 Lyke mę
step 1 is to never type/talk to them like that
Bruce Wayne watched both of his parents die.
Tony Stark has heart problems and anxiety.
Peter Parker saw his uncle being murdered.
Steve Rogers lost his best friend.
Bruce Banner attempted suicide.
If they can save the world, you can get through this day.
Never stop fighting.
none of these people are real